Arts & Culture

The White Lotus
Where: Crave
What: Series, season 3, 8 episodes, new every Sunday
When: Sun., Feb. 16
Genre: Drama
Rating: NNN (out of 5)
Why you should watch: Show’s track record suggests Season 3 will eventually heat up to match White Lotus’s previous levels of intensity

THE LAST THING I expected settling in for the first three episodes of the latest season of writer/director Mike White’s up-until-now awesome upstairs/downstairs view of the guests and staff at luxury resorts, The White Lotus, which debuts tonight, was to be bored.

But I was.

Maybe that’s the problem of the setting, an opulent wellness spa hotel in Thailand that features endless scenes of people being massaged or receiving very mellow treatments in almost silent settings as well as abundant atmosphere shots of lizards darting and water dripping “meaningfully” from the leaves of tropical plants. To add to the mellow vibe, the drama occasionally breaks away to a nearby Buddhist temple, partially the reason the Ratliffs — a grumpy, entitled family of two adults and three youths from North Carolina — have chosen the resort.

Mom Victoria is promisingly played with quirky, sometimes irritating conviction by Parker Posey and will have to fill the huge hole left by the death of Jennifer Coolidge’s Tanya McQuoid (unless she makes a Chilean-kayaker-like reappearance from the deadly depths). Like most of the characters this season, much of the rest of the family are jerks, especially oldest son Saxon (greasily played by The Terminator’s son, Patrick Schwarzenegger), who is desperate to please his icy father Timothy (Jason Isaacs) who is seemingly unable to shake a growing scandal at the brokerage he and his son work at.

Younger siblings Piper (Sarah Catherine Hook) and Lochlan (Sam Nivola) are among the closest to likable characters this season.

The “downstairs” staff-focused storyline sees a simmering relationship between staffers, hotel manager Mook, played by K-pop star Lalisa Manobal of Blackpink and security guard Gaitok (Tayme Thapthimthong) that is so devoid of sexual energy, the roles could be played by Kermit and Miss Piggy.

And that’s another problem of early episodes of Season 3 — it’s just not that’s sexy. It’s a got cotillion-cool to it consistent with the show’s mega-mellow vibe.

A core of catty three amigas, offers narrative promise as three girlfriends-since-high school reconvening, including successful TV star Jaclyn Lemon (Michelle Monaghan) well-married elite Kate (Leslie Bibb) and slightly lost pal Laurie (Carrie Coon), only to have any twosome of the trio diss on the missing member as they whine over wine.

Walter Goggins, doing his best Young Jack Nicholson impression ups the creep-ante as Rich Hatchett, a man with a troubled and dark past who is the potentially abusive boyfriend to his much younger companion, Chelsea (Aimee Lou Wood) herself a glimmer of hope for a decent person among this cast of mostly miscreants.

Am I giving up? Of course not. Maybe, emboldened by his mega-success, show creator White has decided to somnolently push the envelope of narrative ease, slowly unfolding his Season 3 tale with the story eventually prepared to heat up searing a five-alarm serving of red Thai chiles.

Regardless, I’ll be there for the each week for the final five episodes of Lifestyles of the Rich and Fucked Up.